Thursday, October 18, 2007

Clocked: An Oral History (In 3 Parts)

This film is split in to three 15min segments. In this first segment the audience gets to know some of the players in the Bay Area trans community.

This second segment is a more in depth look at community and how individuals see their own diverse communities.


The third segment is a continuation of commentary on the state of the trans communities but adds a conversation about vision and direction.

If you like this film and would like to see the full version please feel free to purchase this film directly from Customflix by clicking the "Add to Cart" button on the right side of this page. Your purchase will ensure that this important work is continued...

Sunday, September 16, 2007

Graduation Finally!

Here I am at 30 finally a bachelor, lol. My wife was the unsteady hand on the camera, you try getting a clear shot with a wiggling 2-year-old on your lap. It was a great day, August 25th, and a great place to have a graduation ceremony, the Unitarian Church on Franklin and Geary. I had a speech prepared, it was open mic, but I left it in Sadie's diaper bag, so I didn't get to use it. I hope that you enjoy it as much as I enjoyed writing it.


New College of California has a special place in my heart today. When I told my friends that I would be speaking at an open mic graduation ceremony, they would look at me and say "How very New College." I have to say that this college is one of the most unique university experiences I have ever had. And to say that my cohort was a unique one would be a gross understatement. I truly got to study with some of the most interesting people that I have ever met.

Alcina, a mother of two with a passion for conflict resolution. Kd, a personal chef with a deep love of indigenous food culture. Letha, a mother from Mariposa with a heart of gold and a love for mapping the cultural exchange of the Silk Road. Noel, a poet whose words flowed like milk and honey, with a passion for Aikido and nonviolence. Fran, a Universal Sufi Minister with the divine mission to bring enlightenment to all. Gilbert, the actor with the goal of cataloging the Roxy Film Archive. Chris, the young man from Santa Cruz who got his kicks with permaculture. Marion, whose true love of the theater was as amazing as her ability with Dreamweaver. Young Hee, the critical mind who kept everyone on their toes, seeking something more that scaling half dome could give her. Michelle, the Texan who flew out every other weekend to grace us with her presence, whose deep devotion to G-d was evident in her every breath. And Sandy, the mother of us all with her Wacky Science experiments and beautiful presence.

Along the way we lost some, Letha and Chris graduated before most of us, and gained some, Michelle and Fran came to us in the last semester. However, the bond between us is still strong, we keep in touch with our Yahoo! Group, Cohort Alchemy. The name in itself is pretty self explanatory, we were a complex group of people with many different interconnected aspects and turned ourselves into a cohort. Though, it is much more than that, through much gnashing of teeth and pulling of hair we painstakingly turned ourselves into a cohort no matter where people went after the experience. A group of friends who will make it their life's work to keep in touch and update each-other on their joys, like Kd's recent wedding, and sorrows, like Michelle's fight to come out here for this graduation.

Through it all, we have remained individuals and true to ourselves, while still becoming part of a whole. I know that I will take this experience with me into the world on the other side of college, over the rainbow as it were. And move through the world with a purpose that encompasses not only my values but those of my friends, my cohort, my college.

How very New College, indeed.

Friday, August 3, 2007

AGENCY has an Air Date!

Air Date: Sept. 16th 2007
Time: 8:30 PM
Only of ACCESSF, Cable Chanel 29

An unscripted interview show that focuses on personal stories and reflections about enacting change through spiritual, political, literary or cultural agency

Friday, July 13, 2007

Clocked: An Oral History

This film is split in to three 15min segments. In this first segment the audience gets to know some of the players in the Bay Area trans community.

This second segment is a more in depth look at community and how individuals see their own diverse communities.


The third segment is a continuation of commentary on the state of the trans communities but adds a conversation about vision and direction.

If you like this film and would like to see the full version please feel free to purchase this film directly from Customflix by clicking the "Add to Cart" button on the right side of this page. Your purchase will ensure that this important work is continued...

Monday, July 9, 2007

Agency on Access 29



  1. That by which something is accomplished or some end achieved: agent, instrument, instrumentality, instrumentation, intermediary, mean, mechanism, medium, organ. See means.
I am expanding this oral history project into a television show on the local cable access channel. The shows title is Agency and the first show will be filmed on July 21st from 1:30pm to 4:00pm at AccesSF's studio. I wanted to do the same thing that I did with Clocked, in so much as the questions will remain the same and the ethnographic aspect will remain intact. The show will similarly focus on the personal stories and reflections this time about enacting change through spiritual, political, literary or cultural agency.

If anyone would like to participate or be a guest on the show, please feel free to contact me. I started to work on the opening segment and really think I like it!

Tell me what you think?

Thursday, June 21, 2007

Late trans leader honored

Published 06/21/2007

JoAnne Keatley, left, and Martin Rawlings-Fein, present the Outstanding Transgender Individual Award posthumously to the late Louis (Lou) G. Sullivan, whose sister, Maryellen Handley, accepted the award on his behalf. The third biennial Transgender Awards were presented by SF Transgender Empowerment Advocacy & Mentorship Monday, June 18 at a reception at the LGBT Community Center. Others who were honored included Chris Daley of the Transgender Law Center, who received the ally award; and the Transgender Resources and Neighborhood Space program at UCSF, which received the organization award.

Wednesday, June 6, 2007

Trans Celebration Shabbat (WOW)

As a filmmaker I get really nervous before showings and that is ok, because usually there are a smattering of people in the crowd. On Friday the 1st of June at the Trans Celebration Shabbat, I had a double dose of the nerves because I was not only showing my film, Clocked: An Oral History, I was also one of the producers of the weekend and my mother was attending from Klamath Falls, OR. I wanted everything to go well for the entire weekend, so much that I came by the synagogue that afternoon to set up the projector and sound equipment about 6 hours before showtime. I readied myself for the 20 people that I expected to show up at the film screening and was surprised to find that more people than seats arrived. The room was filled to capacity and people were spilling out into the hallways, the adjoining classrooms and the stairwell.

The energy was palpable and I felt as if everything would go well for the entire weekend if my little film could drag this many people to the shul on a Friday evening, free food or not. Upon looking around the room for the faces I knew, there were a few, and many I hadn't seen in years. Yet, the majority of those crowding into the oneg room were strangers to me. People sat on the floor, the extra folding chairs, they also stood and peered around the corner while some just closed their eyes and listened to the dialog.

The Trans Celebration Shabbat brought people of every religion, and knowledge of the trans-communities, out of the woodwork to be part of something celebratory and wonderful. There is a line in my film delivered by Cecilia Chung, "In the last 40 years, we spent many years mourning and grieving what we did didn't have or what we've lost, mourning and grieving how we survived a very violent time in our community history; but because of all the progress we make, I think we will see more people feel empowered to talk about what leadership means; what diversity means; what celebrating themselves means. And gender and sexualities are meant to be celebrated, not to be grieved." I think that this is important, as transpeople we need to celebrate ourselves, our gender, our sexuality and our lives in community with others. It is when we touch others hearts and minds that we are blessed in return.

Friday, June 1, 2007

TONIGHT! New Screening for Clocked! (San Francisco, CA)

J. the Jewish news weekly of Northern California

From the J:

Shaar Zahav to host transgender events

San Francisco’s Congregation Shaar Zahav will make history when it becomes the first synagogue to host a Shabbat weekend devoted to transgendered people and issues of concern to the transgender community. The transgender Shabbat service, which begins with a potluck dinner and service, takes place Friday and Saturday, June 1 and 2. All events are open to the public.

Friday’s events begin at 6:30 p.m. with a screening of “Clocked: An Oral History,” a film about the local transgender community from filmmaker and Shaar Zahav congregant Martin Rawlings-Fein. It will be followed by a Shabbat service led by Shaar Zahav rabbinic intern Reuben Zellman.

Saturday programs run from 9 a.m. to 6 p.m. and include Torah study; a workshop for teens moderated by Alexis Rivera from the Transgender Law Center; a discussion for parents on how to determine if their child is gender variant; and a workshop on “How to be a Fabulous Trans Ally,” moderated by United Genders of the Universe.

A pair of transgender-themed short films will also screen, followed by a workshop called “Developing New Jewish Rituals” for transgender and queer congregants; a workshop on transgender civil rights law; and one exploring Torah and spirituality sponsored by Coastside Jewish Community. Havdallah takes place at 5:30 p.m., followed by a spoken-word performance by Ali Cannon.

Shaar Zahav congregant Robert Bernardo said, “A lot of the [transgender] events in the last year have been sad occasions, usually to remember someone murdered or hurt. We wanted to create a celebration of diversity, a happy event about lively expression, being proud and being out.”

From Marty:

The J. got a few things wrong (The dinner with the movie will not be potluck, lol) but they did try to be inclusive and talk about transgender issues. Just think 30 years ago they wouldn't even touch press about the G & L communities, now they print stories about the T communities having fabulous events at LGBTQQS Synagogues.

This film screening is the second chance to see Clocked outside of my living room screenings. You don't have to stay and listen to the sermon if you don't want, but the whole weekend looks fabulous.

Friday Night June 1st at 6:30pm (Film Start Time)
Sha'ar Zahav, 290 Dolores Street, SF CA
Enjoy finger foods and watch clocked projected on the big screen!

Claudia Kenworthy Oral History

Patricia Kevina Fili Oral History

Friday, May 18, 2007

Two New Film Screenings in San Francisco

Two New Film Screenings of Clocked: An Oral History
FTM San Francisco
(@ the EVRC)
Saturday afternoon, May 19th, 2-5pm (Tomorrow!)

FTM SF Monthly Meeting (Open): Saturday, May 19th, 2:00 to 5:00 pm. Location: 100 Collingwood (between 18th and 19th Street in the Castro) @ the Eureka Valley Recreation Center in the auditorium. Please arrive at 2pm to ensure that the presentation can start promptly at 2:30pm.


The Trans Celebration Shabbat
(@ Congregation Sha’ar Zahav, 290 Dolores)
Friday evening, June 1st, 6:30-7:45pm

6:30-7:45 p.m. Film, discussion and food – Clocked: An Oral History features a diverse representation of the Bay Area transgender community. The showing will be followed by a discussion with the filmmaker, our very own congregant Martin Rawlings-Fein, along with two of the films subjects: Zander Keig and Kathryn Steuerman. Food provided!

Documentary Film DescriptionClocked: An Oral History is an intimate portrait of transgender communities through personal insights, stories and reflections on the meaning of community and being transgender.

Thank you! I look forward to seeing you all there!

Wednesday, May 16, 2007

Clocked at Home

Now you too can enjoy popcorn while watching Clocked on the smaller screen! Thanks to, and their One Thousand Indies Project, I was able to set up an online store in which the professional DVD can be sold and mailed out on an on demand basis. One small step for anyone who wants to see it without waiting for the festival brigade.

More good news: I am officially a graduate of New College of California! (Confetti Drops) It has been a grueling year and a half since I transfered with anthropology on the brain and ended up in Media Studies with a movie in the can. What I can say about NCOC is that the college is what you make of it and the education process can be very rewarding for both the student and the faculty advisor.

Monday, April 30, 2007

Clocked did not make the festival cut for Frameline 31

The letter read said that they got over 600 submissions and they hope I will apply next year in December...

Wednesday, April 25, 2007

Kathryn Steuerman Oral History

Kathryn is an Outreach Worker and Health Educator for Transgender Resource and Neighborhood Space (TRANS), a program of the University of California, San Francisco. She lives in Berkeley with her two cats and her elusive womanhood. Have you seen it?

Monday, April 23, 2007

A Friend Pays Tribute to a Fellow Documentarian

Janetta Johnson recalling stories about Nadia Cabezas. Nadia was sent to the angels by an unlicensed, uninsured driver who was paying attention to his eating and not his driving and hit her. Nadia, aka "Kitty Kastro" was the producer, director, and hostess of television's first transgender community cable show called "Tranny Talk" originating from San Francisco. She accomplished this with her long-time partner, Dina Boyer. This memorial service was at St. Anthony's within the realm of the Tenderloin, Nadia's home turf. She will be missed but remembered eternally.

Mikayla Connell Oral History

Mikayla was elected President of SF Pride in November, 2006 and has served on the board of directors for the Transgender Law Center, including 2 years as its Board Chair, and has served as a member and Vice-Chair of the California State Bar Committee on Sexual Orientation and Gender Identity Discrimination. By day she is an attorney for the Judicial Council of California but by night she is an activist, actress, gamer and mom. Though she works and volunteers, her first love is her family, namely, her son Mick, her cat Firefly, and her partner of 4 years, Melinda.

Autumn Sandeen Oral History

Autumn is the Transgender American Veterans Association (TAVA) secretary, a Transgender Advocacy And Services Center (TASC) of San Diego Planning Group Member, and is a contributing author for the Ex-Gay Watch.

Lyle Garcia-Blake Oral History

Lyle is a software professional who has appeared in photographic exhibits across the United States and on television raising gender awareness and educating the public. He has presented workshops at the 2005 and 2006 Gender Odyssey conferences and on numerous trans-focused panels.

Festival Application Donations

In my never ending romp through festival guides, I am searching everywhere for my target audience... Those that do not know a stitch about what it is like to be transgender or transsexual in real life experience. That being said, my audience is everyone besides those living in trans-communities. For someone who has run out of financial aid and hard drive space, lol -- I am getting pretty bold with the promoting.

If anyone would be so kind, these are the festivals that I have applied to and have not sent the proverbial check in the mail. While it isn't tax deductible yet, it is a worthwhile cause and your donations will make a real dent in costs associated with the Oral History Project. Just click on the "Donate Now" button at the top of the blog to send funds. I will start a donor page for those who see something in the film and send them a copy of the film as a thank you.

Hawaii International Film Festival
27 Annual from October 18, 2007 to October 28, 2007
Entry Fee: 50.00 U.S. Dollar

Moondance International Film Festival

8 Annual from September 14, 2007 to September 16, 2007
Entry Fee: 75.00 U.S. Dollar

Nevada City Film Festival

7 Annual from August 16, 2007 to August 19, 2007
Entry Fee: 50.00 U.S. Dollar
50.00 U.S. Dollar Rec'd via online 17-apr-2007

2007 Great Lakes Independent Film Festival

6 Annual from September 26, 2007 to September 30, 2007
Entry Fee: 35.00 U.S. Dollar

Thursday, April 5, 2007

Transnation (Martin Coast to Coast)

Two new profiles out in the world about yours truly, I was a bit
embarrassed about some of the comments that went to print but overall
it is a great profile.

SF Bay Times

Boston's Bay Windows

Tuesday, March 27, 2007

Wow what a weekend!

The LA crowd is very loving and kind. The summit was a success and the Healing Ourselves workshop that I was a part of was a hit. I got some great footage so look for more oral histories and conference footage over the next few weeks. The goal is to produce a small 30 min tribute to those who worked behind the scenes and out in front with this years conference.

I did get to promote the film and made some connections with FTM Alliance, TGSF, Genderqueer Revolution, the Billy Defrank Center, Transgiving and LOTUS. I am sending a few preview copies out to these orgs and others for their library's.

Tuesday, March 13, 2007

Going to LA for the Leadership Summit

Well people, I am going to the 2nd Transgender Leadership Summit in LA on the 23rd of this month. I plan on doing more ethnographic interviews in the space between workshops. I am once again presenting the Healing Ourselves Through Activism workshop that everyone liked last year. It is nice having something to do during conferences besides attend the workshops. I am ecstatic that I will be able to continue the film project in LA with the help of TLC and the summit. Of course it is not without a price, I will have to leave my family behind in San Francisco to film the plenaries on Friday and Sunday for the summit.

One of the original subjects, Red Jordan Arobateau, suggested that I do the project in phases, Clocked Cycle One and so forth... I am more inclined to do Clocked: LA, Clocked: San Francisco and the like... This could get really big!

On another note, I am still waiting on the Frameline International LGBT Film Festival for word on whether or not Clocked had been admitted. I am fairly certain that it will be but Shelli keeps telling me not to count my chickens.

Sunday, February 18, 2007

Ongoing Project?

Some of you have asked if this will be an ongoing project... the simple answer is YES. I am about to graduate from my Media Studies program and after that I do plan to continue the oral histories. I am also working on very low funding as well, so if any of you know where I could find donors, or if you can help with writing grants and such please contact me!


Tuesday, February 13, 2007

Why Clocked?

This project was started by the prodding of a friend at the Transgender Leadership Summit in February of 2006. Gayle R. asked me about ethnographies and oral histories in response to some of the great stories told by the elders at the summit. When I got home, I hit the street and talked to everyone I could about doing an oral history project about the trans community. At the time I was on a fundraising committee for the film Screaming Queens: The Riot at Compton's Cafeteria and that gave me the opportunity to talk with Susan Stryker and Victor Silverman about filmmaking. Both thought it would be interesting to see what would happen if the communities were given a voice.

First I needed a camera, and I couldn't use my old VHS-C. Being a working poor student pushed me to get inventive with funding and I applied for some extra financial aid. For the price of a budget 3 chip camera, 10 MiniDV tapes and 20 DVD-R's I got started. I took my love of ethnography and started writing questions for my academic advisor to approve. Once the legal and academic needs were met I grabbed my camera and started filming my first subject, Zion Johnson. His interview was a great experience and when he talked about Clocking T, I asked if I could use the word in the title of the film. Thus the film Clocked: An Oral History was born.

Sunday, February 11, 2007

Cecilia Chung Oral History

Cecilia is the Deputy Director of the Transgender Law Center, a member the San Francisco Human Rights Commission and has been a San Francisco resident since 1985.Cecilia is one of the founding producers of the annual Trans March.

Deadre Bruetsch Oral History

Deadre lives and works in the San Francisco Bay area. She shares her home with her current partner and her adopted mother. Bruetsch is active in the Metropolitan Community Church and volunteers with a number of LGBT organizations.

Zion Johnson Oral History

Zion is a 33 year old electrical drafter in San Francisco, the former President of Female to Male International and the brains behind the 2005-2006 Men of FTM International calendar.

Zander Keig Oral History

Zander has been a queer and trans community advocate and activist since 1987. He resides in San Francisco with his wife, Margaret. In 2007 he will begin a 3 year term as board vice president for Female to Male International.

Saturday, February 10, 2007

Red Jordan Arobateau Oral History

Red is a prolific writer who has documented the GLBT (and straight) communities for 40 years. He is a documentarian, who writes with love, humor and great ideas. His work is available over the Internet at various sites including Amazon & Lulu.

Monday, February 5, 2007

How Do You Identify?

This is one of the first small projects I worked on while editing the film. I started by taking the parts about identity that I had footage of and working them into a snipit about the film.

About Martin

Martin Rawlings-Fein is a former steering committee member of Female-to-Male San Francisco, the former Co-Chair of Female-to-Male International, the former Co-Chair of San Francisco Transgender Empowerment, Advocacy & Mentorship and a current appointee to the San Francisco Human Rights Commission LGBT Advisory Committee. Martin is also a lay leader at Congregation Sha’ar Zahav, San Francisco’s only LGBTIQQS affiliated synagogue and is one of the founding producers of the annual Trans March.